Welcome...

After many false starts, it is now time to get stage-ready again. Follow the highs, lows, frustrations, successes and yes, quite possibly some crazy along the way...

Monday, October 8, 2012

All of your questions...answered.

So, I am overwhelmed with questions - and they are mostly the same over and over again, so here are the answers...

1. How did you do? While I do not know my official placing yet - I know that I did not place in the top 5.  But I really didn't go into this show anticipating that I would place.  This show was my pro debut.  I was heavier than I should have been going into my contest prep, and I struggled through an injury along the way that compromised my ability to work on certain muscle groups.  At 4-5 weeks out, there was question about whether I would be ready at all.  Ultimately, my goal this year was to get on the pro stage before I lost my pro status and I was able to accomplish that goal - so I am pleased.  Bodybuilding is a subjective sport.  While there are guidelines and things that the judges are looking for, ultimately it does come down to standing in front of a group of people and leaving the results up to their opinions.  It ain't for everyone, and it is sometimes a terrible mind game to play with yourself - but it's the sport I love!

2. Where are the pictures?  I don't have any yet!  Waiting for 2 different sets - but I will be sure to post as soon as I have them.  In the meantime, I have posted the video of my individual routine!

3.  What now? Can you eat normal again?  I ate semi-normal for most of the weekend (After the show was over) - but I have picked the next show date...5 weeks from now, so it's back on the plan I go.  After putting 20 weeks into this, I just don't feel ready to be done yet.  Trust me, I thought I would be.  This 20 weeks has not been easy - but I just want to see what I can do if I spend another 5 trying to get a little leaner.  I am also going to try competing with a different federation - again at the amateur level.  I have only ever competed with OCB or IFPA and I wanted to give something new a try.

4. How did you feel/did you have fun?  I felt great.  Despite thinking I missed my mark slightly - I still feel that I brought my best physique yet to the stage and that's really all I can ask...to get a little bit better each time I get up there.  And I did have fun.  It was a great trip with great friends and a well-run show, which always makes for a good experience.

The only other thing I can say is that I will NEVER, no, not EVER drive to Cape Code again!  This girl will fly.  What should have been 6 1/2 hours in the car turned into a nightmare of a trek that felt like days - going each way.  I don't even know why - I just know I won't do it again!!  But if you ever visit Cape Cod - make sure you visit the "Pancake Man".  The Peanut Butter Cup Pancakes are bangin'!!

Thursday, October 4, 2012

Wow! 2 Days left!!

I am completely overwhelmed with emotion this morning.  As I left the gym, having officially completed my last workout of this 20 week competition prep, I actually began to tear up!  It is crazy when you work so hard for so long and then realize that all of the work is done.  138 days ago, I set off on this journey, unsure of whether or not I would be successful.  I have been faced with challenges that I did not anticipate - including an injury that affected my workouts for 8 weeks.  And so just knowing that I have made it, and I'm a little over 48 hours away from getting up on that stage again is such a good feeling.  

It's a little bittersweet for me this time around though.  I will be missing a key person this weekend - my best friend, training partner and usually my back-stage support person.  Thanks to technology, Bill has been able to see my progress and give me words of encouragement along the way - so he's kind of been along for the ride - But he's had the benefit of not having to be here to deal with my moods!!  

Which leads me to the other reason why I am so overwhelmed with emotion.  I am so blessed to be surrounded by an amazing network of support in the form of family, friends, clients and class participants.  I could not begin to list all of the people who have gone out of their way to lend support, offer help, or just go out of their way to send words of encouragement my way - but every single on of you has made an impact on me during this process.  The excitement that my class participants have shown each week to hear about my progress and their patience with my gradually declining energy levels in classes has been a constant source of positive energy for me during this 20 weeks, and I will hear some of your voices in my head as I take the stage this weekend.
 
 My clients have been incredibly tolerant of my moods, my energy levels and my constant chatter (ok, maybe sometimes whining) about being hungry, tired, frustrated with the scale, etc.  I have received gifts that I never anticipated, and that were incredibly thoughtful and generous!  I know that a few of you can't wait for me to be "back to normal" - and I appreciate you sticking it out with me!!

Most surprising has been the number of people (mostly on facebook or at the Y) who have stopped to say good luck or ask me how it's going.  People that I didn't even realize knew what I was up to have stopped to wish me luck and it's been amazing!  

On a side note, it's also been a little weird.  People seem to say whatever is on their mind to me.  And when I'm in the gym, it's almost always worse.  The best example came earlier this week when a "regular" at the gym was talking to me and, while looking directly at the spot where my boobs used to be, asked if my "lack of 'female parts' (with air quotes) would count against me on stage?"  Wow!  Amazingly, I found myself explaining the difference between figure and bodybuilding and getting into a conversation about what judges look for.  What I was thinking was, "well, I don't think we've found a way to build boobs in the gym, so I don't think that falls under the bodybuilding category...your calves, on the other hand, would!".  Ah, it's never a dull moment in the gym...but I digress.  

Finally, for the amazing gift of my 3 closest friends, who are putting aside their lives and leaving their families for the weekend to travel to the show with me, there are no words to express my gratitude.  I knew when I decided to prep for this show, that Bill would be gone, and the idea of traveling so far away from home for a show by myself was not the happiest of scenarios.  But I never imagined that the 3 of you would be willing to come with me.  I know that you have no idea what you have gotten yourselves into - and I can only say that Saturday will be a new experience for the 4 of us to share!!  Rachel, Denise and Nancy:  I love you guys.  And I am so excited to share this weekend with you!   

Lots of packing still left to do - so it's time for me to wrap it up.  Looking forward to lots of steak and sweet potatoes in the next 48 hours.  You may not want to approach me if I am eating - especially if my eyes are closed and I'm making noise!  Til next time...thanks for reading, and keep workin' it!!

Monday, September 17, 2012

Progress and My Random Thoughts

So if you've been following along, you may already know that I'm cranky because I don't eat a lot of calories during the day - even though I'm eating 7 times a day!  And you may also know that one of my biggest complaints lately is that EVERY pair of my pants (spandex included) are falling down on me - but, I bet you didn't know that as it gets closer and closer to show time, it gets harder to shave your armpits!  Yep, as the contours of my body change - it just gets harder and harder to get in there...and that's my random thought for the day!  (I know you were just dying to know that ;-)

So, 122 days ago I started the journey back to the competitive bodybuilding stage.  My official start weight was 210 pounds.  Although between the time I actually decided to compete and the time I started on the diet plan, I may have put on a few extra "unreported" pounds;-)

This before picture caused tears in my household, and even a little argument between me and my husband.  I actually contemplated not competing just to get out of having to send this picture to my new trainers. I was mortified that I had put on so much weight.  I didn't even recognize the person in this picture!  BUT, it came down to realizing that if I didn't pick a show date, things were likely to get worse before they got better (With Bill leaving, I was sure I would not handle the stress well without food or wine).  So I sent the pictures and swore that NO ONE else would see them!
Now that I have seen results, I am more comfortable about posting it here.  I think it's important to see what goals can do for you.  If you really decide that you want something, no matter how unattainable it seems, you can accomplish it with the right motivation and a little help.  Or a lot of help.  But I'll get to that later!


I can't really call this next picture "after" because we're not there yet!  But, we are getting there.  Current weight is 173 pounds.  Just 4 pounds heavier than the day I earned my pro card.  I have 18 days left to burn off as much more fat as I can.  And before you say it...yes, there is fat left to get rid of ;-)  I need to be lighter than I have ever been on stage before - because while I am likely carrying more muscle mass after 3 years of continuing to lift heavy - now that I am competing at the pro level, I need to be leaner. 


Unfortunately, during these last few weeks, it becomes difficult for those around me to understand why I'm still trying to lose.  I look ridiculous in my clothes - they are all super baggy and just hanging off of me.  Most of the time I walk around looking like I'm sort of in a daze - and I am - it's the result of months of calorie restriction, and 2 workouts a day, 7 days per week.  I could hit the beach in my bikini and feel like I'm totally rockin' it - especially with my 4 kids in tow;-)  HOWEVER, the sport of bodybuilding is about developing all of the muscles in the body, and then showing them off.  The only way for the judges to see if you have developed your musculature evenly and with good symmetry is if you shed as much fat away as you possibly can.  Basically, you are trying to become a walking anatomy lesson before you get up on stage.  The last few weeks are NOT healthy.  My weight the day of the show shouldn't be sustainable for long (if I'm as lean as I should be), and it is not a body type that anyone should be striving to achieve just to go on vacation and look good in their swimsuit.  But it is what is necessary for the sport. 

I have several people close to me who get concerned at the end that I'm getting "too skinny" or they ask if what I'm doing is "healthy"?  But let's look at marathon running for a moment instead.  I know several marathoners (or longer distance runners).  They suffer from dead toe nails that turn black and fall off.  They battle hazardous health conditions like dehydration and heat stress/exhaustion, and they continue to train with common runner's injuries so that they don't fall too far off their training plan. Are these things healthy?  Probably not any more so than what I'm doing.  It is the nature of sport and competition.  It is, ultimately, about pushing yourself beyond your own self-imposed limits.  The feeling of success or failure rarely comes from a medal or a trophy, or even where you placed - but instead, success is about completing the journey that you chose for yourself.  Reaching the goal.  Knowing that you pushed harder than you thought you could.  And then looking forward, and picking the next goal. 

While I can't say for sure what the next goal for me will be - I know there will be one.  Right now, my sights are set on October 6th.  You may think it gets harder at the end as more calories get taken away and more cardio gets added in - but the opposite is true.  I'm no longer counting weeks or months - but days.  I'm down to days!  18 of them.  That's it.  And that's nothing!!  I'd be lying if I said I wasn't completely obsessed with food and all of the things that I think I'll want to eat when I get off that stage.  But at this point, I've come too far to not move full steam ahead.  And things will change more frequently now as we start to tweak things so that I can try to look my best on stage - that keeps it exciting. 

Thanks for following - and to many of you, thanks for your support.  I'll post again soon - maybe when my suits come in later this week...yay!  But in the meantime, think about your goals.  Do you have one?  Are you working towards it?  Need a little push?  Pull out your "before" picture - that may help ;-)

Sunday, September 2, 2012

Keeping it Real

I usually like to wrap some sort of inspirational message into my blog posts - so, WARNING...this is not one of those kinds of posts.  Today, it's about keeping it real!

I make my living, spend my days and use up a lot of my recreational time helping to motivate other people - because that's what I love to do!  I'm sure many people think that because I can motivate others - I have no problem motivating myself...but the truth is, I need a push every now and then just like anyone else.
I often encourage my clients and class participants to remind themselves of their goal.  Why they showed up for class, or signed up for training, or registered for that race to begin with.  I tell them to recommit to the goal and the reasons behind it when they start to feel tired or unmotivated.

So, it is very frustrating for me to find myself unmotivated, discouraged and having difficulty remembering why I set out on this journey to begin with.  It happens, it's normal, but it feels pretty crappy.  It is especially frustrating because it hit me at the end of a week that was actually pretty good.  I was released from Physical therapy, I am back to 75% of normal weight on deadlifts and 70% of normal squat weight, and I'm teaching all formats of classes again - all huge steps in the right direction!  BUT...

I am 5 weeks out now - and should be feeling really good about my progress.  I should be feeling a renewed push towards the end.  I mean, 15 weeks of this are already behind me!!  Instead, the changes in my body have come to what seems like a screeching halt. I am tired and hungry and asking myself why - if I can't keep dropping the pounds - am I continuing to do this.  And then the second-guessing yourself starts to drive you crazy!!  Why am I doing this?  Should I be doing this?  Do I WANT to be doing this?  Wouldn't it be easier to try this another time?  When the kids are older?  When hubby is home?  If I just throw in the towel now, I could EAT!!  What I want.  Now.  

BUT, there it is, that crucial thought.  Throw in the towel?  Give up? Quit?  

NO.  Not an option.  As frustrated and unmotivated as I am feeling right now, I know that I don't want to have to admit that I quit.  Some days that's a matter of principle, some days just a matter of pride - but either way, it is the one thought that will keep me going.  As much as I don't want to go spend 80 minutes on the treadmill - because lately it feels pointless - I will.  I will put on my gym clothes, grab the ipod and get my ass to the gym.  I will battle the demons in my head and ignore the voices telling me to blow it off "just this once".  Because I know that if I can ignore those voices enough days in a row, then eventually, I will find my motivation again.  I will remember why I started this and how important it was to me.  

So if you're looking for me, I'll be at the gym.  Feel free to stop by the treadmill and keep me company for a few minutes - I'll be there a while!   

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

MOTIVATION AND HONESTY

Motivation...
It's a funny thing, isn't it?  It comes from many places, yet sometimes seems to hide all together.  

Back in 2007, I was at a bodybuilding show with a co-worker supporting a mutual friend who was competing that day.  As we sat there watching the parade of hard bodies on the stage, I commented that I had often thought about getting into bodybuilding and that being there at the show was making me think it was time. 

Her response?  "Do you think now is the really the best time, with your kids being so young, and Bill's job being so crazy?"

What I heard her say..."You can't do it."  What that meant to me...GAME ON!!!!

6 months later, I began to prep for my first show, and that was the beginning of a 2 year quest to earn my pro card.  6 shows later, I had accomplished just that.

What should have been 2 years of solid growth, then turned into basically a really long off-season. Trouble is, in bodybuilding, there isn't an off-season.  You're either growing (muscles, not fat thank you very much;-) or you're cutting.  For 2 years I really did neither.  Oh, there were attempts to get ready for shows - all "epic fails" as my son would say.  What I was lacking was the motivation to follow through.  I had lost my spark.  

Then my husband found out that he was getting deployed.  And the date of my expiring pro card loomed in the very near future.  It was ALMOST  a perfect storm of motivation.  I started talking with some people close to me about competing.  And about Bill going away.  And do you know what most of them said?  "Do you really want to put yourself through that while your husband's gone?"

Do you know what I heard?  Yes, I heard "you can't"...it was definitely GO TIME!!!  I had found my spark.

I still have people asking me if this is the best time for me to be prepping for a show.  My answer is always quick...Yes, there couldn't be a better time.  Life is insane in this household - even when Bill is home.  But with him gone, the stress of keeping up with everything alone is CRAZY!!!  Prepping for a show gives me something to focus on.  It's my constant right now.  And it makes me take time for myself, away from the kids, which is good for me AND them.  Plus, the truth of the matter is that if I wasn't contest prepping, my tendency would be to eat and drink wine and wallow in my sorrows.  So I have no doubt that I would have put on weight since Bill left.  And let's face it, no one wants to be fatter when their husband comes home from deployment!! (and there's your first dose of honesty for the day)

Bill has been on active duty for 20 weeks.  With the exception of a few weeks, we have not seen him, he has not been home.  I have been on the contest prep diet for 13 1/2 weeks.  Seems like a long time, on both counts - but in a way, we're just getting started.  Bill actually just left the country last week, and is probably looking at being gone for at least another 23 weeks, so we are only half-way through missing him.  

As for contest prep, I have 6 1/2 weeks to go.  In some ways, they are the easiest weeks to get through.  You start to see the body that is going to emerge on stage, you know you are close to the goal, you can almost see the light at the end of the tunnel.  BUT, as the body gets leaner, it gets harder to lose the fat.  The diet gets skimpier, the workouts get fatter.  This morning was a "talking to myself out-loud argument" to get my a** up out of the bed for cardio.  But, then there was this little thing called motivation.  And you wanna know where it came from today?  Reminding myself, for all 20 minutes of HIIT training, that my husband is in a much crappier place right now than inside the walls of a gym.  Yes, the very thing that weighs heavily on my mind for most of the day, was actually my source of motivation this morning.  

Now, for your second dose of honesty...
I get asked daily how I'm doing.  How's the training?  How's the diet? How's the hip?  Have you heard from Bill?  I love the interest and concern, and about 75% of the time, I enjoy sharing the journey with people.  But 100% of the time, when I answer, I am trying very hard to sugar-coat what I am saying.  You know, put a humorous spin on things, take the focus off the crappy stuff.  Some days, it's easier than others.  Today, just making the effort to answer had me in tears moments before having to teach a class.  You see, the truth is, today, it sucks.  All of it.  The diet and workouts I can live with because I chose this goal.  Missing my training partner, my best friend, my rock?  Well, I live with that too, because I fell in love with a Marine.  But it doesn't make it suck any less.  

Now, it may seem like I've gotten off-topic, but I don't think so.  A client of mine said something to me last week that really stuck with me:  "No matter how you feel or what you are going through, you are still responsible for your actions."  
At the time, we were talking about teenagers and hormones and needing to be held accountable regardless.  But the more I thought about it, the more I realized how much this quote applies to adults every day.  How many times have you skipped a workout because you were having a bad day?  In a bad mood?  Didn't have the energy?  IT DOESN'T MATTER HOW YOU FEEL, YOU STILL NEED TO BE RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR CHOICES!!  And I've never, not ever, left the gym after a workout thinking, "man, I feel so much worse now".  So, yes, it's a perfect time for me to be in contest prep mode...and every day is a perfect day for you take a step closer to your goals.  So find your motivation, wherever you can - and get back to it!!


Monday, August 6, 2012

The Training Underground

So you won't see any "check-ins" at the gym from me this week.  My training has become much like covert ops.  Sneaking around to different gyms at odd times so that I'm not seen by anyone who knows me.  Why, you ask?  2 reasons...embarrassment, and the misconceptions of the public.  Let me explain...

Thursday night I re-aggravated my injury while lifting at the Y.  After trying to limp around, and then becoming unable to put weight on my leg, it became clear that I wasn't going to be able to get out of the Y on my own.  As staff there, I know that only means one thing...going out in an ambulance.  If only my husband had been in town.  I would have had no problem laying on the weight room floor waiting for him to come carry me out of there.  Leaving the gym in an ambulance is embarrassing enough when you don't work there...being staff makes it 10 times worse.  So, I'm not looking forward to walking back in there and facing the funny looks, and having to tell the story over and over again.  I got hurt.  It happens to the best of us.  Let's move on.

As for misconceptions, I think everyone from my mother to my trainers thinks that I am crazy and over-doing it.  The last thing I want to do is set a bad example for my clients and class participants, so I really need to clear this one up.  I have NOT done anything that my doctor's have not said it was ok to do!!!!  In other words, if they told me to stop doing something, I have.  It's why I haven't worked abs in a month - even though it's killing me not to!!!  Every time I have been told to limit or eliminate a movement, I have.  And when it has been time to add it back in, I have done so cautiously.  I just happen to be dealing with a very tricky injury, with ever-changing symptoms.

Thursday night did seem to be the breaking point, and I was told 2 things that I didn't want to hear...
1. You need to take the next few days off.  "off?" I said.  Yes, off.  Completely.  No workouts.  Period.
2. You need to back off your level and intensity of activity and gradually get back into this.

OK, number one was really hard to swallow.  Friday was easy, I was in no shape to work out, the pain was still too intense.  Saturday wasn't so bad either, I spent a lot of it in the car, and I went to a posing workshop, so I at least felt productive that day.  Sunday, however, was the killer.  I set my alarm with every intention of getting up and doing my cardio.  I planned out my meals in my head to make sure I could get a lift before the gym closed.  Then I got out of bed, and my leg was screaming at me.  Apparently, my body has a better time following directions than my head does.  I took Sunday off as well.  It wasn't easy.  and today I feel like a lazy bag of ****, but I'm not in pain this morning.  Maybe there is a trade-off here.

So number 2 was a little easier to hear, but will prove difficult to deal with in the long run.  With less than 9 weeks til show time, I don't have much wiggle room, so the training must keep rolling.  My training schedule is 3 days of one cardio and one lift, with 2 cardio sessions on day 4, then repeat.  And repeat.  And repeat.  The classes that I teach have nothing to do with my training schedule and don't count towards any of those 14 workouts per week.  It doesn't matter if I teach my normal 4 or if I'm subbing a lot and end up teaching 10, I still have to hit those other workouts to keep moving towards my goal.  When I teach, it is also more difficult for me to pull back on or monitor my intensity - because I am there to give the class a good workout and that's where my focus is.  Training on my own gives me much more control over intensity and speed of movement.  So, for the next week, you won't see me teaching classes.  My body needs that extra time to recover and needs a break from the extra stress and pounding.  Plus, my mom said to slow down, and you can't ignore mom right?

And, just so people don't get the wrong idea, you probably won't see me lifting or doing my cardio either - because I'll be sneaking around to do it!!  NOT because I'm not listening to my doctors, but because I don't want to give people the wrong impression and accidentally become a bad example.

It is important to listen to your body.  I am, even if it doesn't appear that way.  While I am MIA the next week, know that I am thinking about all of you, and hoping that you are training just as hard as ever.  I'm hoping that when I resurface, I will be back stronger than ever.  In the meantime, pay no mind to that person in the corner dressed all in black with their cap pulled down low!!

Thursday, July 26, 2012

Injuries, vacations and other Challenges

So, as someone pointed out to me, it's been a long time since I've posted.  And part of the reason was vacation: planning for it, packing for it, taking it, and trying to recover from it.  Another big part of it was that my recent hip injury made it very uncomfortable to sit - so I've been avoiding anything that requires being at the desk!
But probably the biggest reason of all was that my thoughts have been all over the place....which, of course, is a great reason to just post more often...I'll work on that!

The training:  Things have been going as smoothly as can be expected, all things considered.  I have been limited on squats, deadlifts and core training thanks to an SI joint sprain, a hip flexor strain, and all the related aches, pains and muscle spasms that have gone along with those 2 injuries.  I get asked a lot around the gym, "but what are you doing here?  shouldn't you be resting?"  And the reality is that movement feels much better than rest...sitting and sleeping have been the worst of it!  So, I've had to swallow my pride, cut waaayyy back on my squat and deadlift weight and continue to kill it in the gym.
There was also the matter of vacation to deal with...I was away from home for a total of 11 days.  As a trainer, one of the number one causes I see of people falling off their routines in the summer is vacation...and I always say, "but whyyyyyy?!?!?!"  You don't have to abandon your fitness goals just because you are not at home or near "your gym".  In my case, I did my homework.  I knew where the closest gyms would be to both of the places that I was staying.  I knew what hours they were open, what their guest policies were, and had my workouts planned BEFORE I left home.  But if your goals are simpler...just to maintain fitness or stay in a routine...use what you have around you.  Stairs, sand, benches, a local park, or pack a resistance band or some light dumbbells.  If you plan ahead, you can succeed!

Speaking of vacation....how do most of you eat when you're away?  Don't answer that...I already know.  Here's the thing about contest prep dieting...there IS NO vacation! There is no way of knowing who else is going to share the stage with you and how they are going to look.  All you can do is look your absolute best. Which means 100% on, all the time.  Again, it comes down to planning ahead.  I won't go into the details here - but I will share that I ate one meal out of a baggy in my purse, while my family enjoyed burgers, fries and milkshakes!

So I made it through vacation without missing a workout.  I suffered through my workouts despite being injured - and yet the thing that was stressing me out the most was that I wasn't sleeping.  At all.  No really, for 2 weeks,  I couldn't sleep thanks to the pain from my injury!  And you start to worry.  "If I don't sleep, I can't lose fat."  "If I don't sleep my muscles can't grow"  "If I'm not sleeping, my lifts will suffer." "I can't get on the treadmill at 5 if I'm still wide awake at 3:30!"  But I kept repeating the words my husband always says to me..."Just stay on the diet and you'll be fine".  And you know what, he was right.  I'm finally sleeping again - and I'm happy to say that things still look like they are on track.  (although I send my weight and pictures to my trainers tomorrow - so we'll see what they have to say about it;-)

So, now I am almost half way there.  10 weeks down, 10 to go, and I've lost 24 pounds.  The difference in my body is really starting to show, and I am coming to realize that the weight I am sitting at RIGHT NOW is the weight I'd like to maintain during my next non-competitive season...but that's another goal, and a whole different blog!!  Because, while the compliments on my body are rolling in daily - I'm still only about half-way to where I need to be to show my best physique on stage.  The first few weeks of this were really tough because the weight just didn't seem to be coming off - but I know that it's going to get a lot harder as that show date approaches!  BUT, at this point, you almost go on auto-pilot with the diet and training, because there are other things to focus on...suits, posing, music, posing, tanning, posing, registration, posing, hotel, posing.  Have I mentioned that I need to start working on my posing?!?!?!  Yes, posing practice is another whole element of your training and helps to improve your conditioning and your presence on stage.  You can have the best physique up there, but if you don't know how to show it, and make it look effortless while you're doing it, then it doesn't matter!  So that will have to get added into my weekly routine.

AND - I ordered my suits this week.  Do me a favor ladies...the next time you look at a swimsuit price tag in horror, look up bodybuilding or figure posing suits, take notice of how much LESS material is involved, and then take note of the price tags...you'll feel better about your last swimsuit purchase, I PROMISE!!!

Well, I think I've ranted long enough for one night.  I promise I won't stay gone so long this time!  And I'll leave you with a parting thought:

Your obstacles are what you make of them.  You can decide to let them slow you down or even hold you back, or you can decide that you are up to the challenge and keep plugging along until you find a way around them, over them, or under them if necessary.  Victory is even sweeter, when you know you have fought for it!